Getting an A for the New Year
“In the measurement world, you set a goal and strive for it. In the universe of possibility, you set the context and let life unfold.” The Art of Possibility
With a new year, comes new possibilities. After all the trials and tribulations of 2020, the global anticipation of 2021 was palpable. Unfortunately, I’ve yet to find the magic switch that solves some of the issues we experienced last year that have crept into our long-awaited New Year (if anyone does, please let me know!).
Earlier this month I was contemplating this idea we hold about moving from one year to the next – from feelings of renewal to those good old resolutions, we expect there to be change… and we expect it to be good.
I find that most resolutions or goals focus on “fixing” what we perceive as shortcomings or how we stack up against others. Many times, they are short-lived or unsustainable. However, I believe there is a way to bring more compassion (and passion) to our outlook with better results.
One of the recommended pre-reading assignments for my Berkeley coaching accreditation was The Art of Possibility by Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander. It is an eye-opening book that challenges conventional thinking to break down self and societally imposed constraints to see new possibilities and achieve outcomes not otherwise envisioned.
From The Art of Possibility comes the concept of “Giving an A”. It is the idea that everyone (yourself included) starts out with an A grade. The authors contend that grades “say little about the work done” or, at times, knowledge of the subject (think curves). What they do instead is foster competition and anxiety and limit potential.
Benjamin tested this concept with his music students. At the beginning of the course, they were told that they were all going to get an A; however, the students each had to submit a letter future dated for the end of the course stating why they earned an A. The letters were to begin with, “Dear Mr. Zander, I got my A because…”. The writing had to be in the past tense (think “I did”, not “I will”) and it had to not only focus on the achievement, but the experience behind it. Zander told his students “I am especially interested in the person you will have become by next May. I am interested in the attitude, feelings, and world view of that person who will have done all she wished to do or become everything he wanted to be.”
This approach proved to be transformational. Students turned into the aspirational figures in their letters and “played up” to their full potential. They threw off anxiety and competition and found confidence, teamwork, community, and leadership. My favorite excerpt in the chapter is:
“An A can be given to anyone in any walk of life – to a waitress, to your employer, to your mother-in-law, to the members of the opposite team, and to the other drivers in traffic. When you give an A, you find yourself speaking to people not from a place of measuring how they stack up against your standards, but from a place of respect that gives them room to realize themselves… This A is not an expectation to live up to, but a possibility to live into.”
So how does this relate to the New Year? In November of 2019 I was asked to write myself a note on why I got my A for the year to follow. It was dated November 2020 and started with “I got my A because…”. I revisited that note in December 2020 and it was 99%+ accurate (give or take a month). I wrote about topics personal and professional – about work, family, health. It wasn’t long – “deep and brief” as they say at BECI (Berkeley Executive Coaching Institute). But, man, especially given a pandemic, that’s a pretty good success rate.
After I write this post, I plan to do the same for 2021 and make it an annual tradition. I’m going to write about why I got my A for 2021 – I invite you to do the same. What a refreshing way to start the year and one that I, and others, have found incredibility effective and insightful.
If you want to up the ante, many find even greater commitment when they read their letters aloud. I’m offering a free, friendly, and confidential ear for those who would like to read me their letters. The power of sharing can’t be underestimated. Just drop me a message at tracy@opensparkconsulting.com!
So… what are you waiting for?
1.1.2022
I got my A because…